She Died While Giving Life :
"The saddest day of my life was the day I lost my Aisha" Haruna told me sorrowfully "I once heard that time heals everything but in my case, it makes everything worse".
I met Haruna at the airport, while on a trip to Los Angeles, US. We were on the same plane and he was my sit mate too.
Being an outgoing person and a freelance writer I soon engaged him in a talk and thanks to a few communication skills I learnt in Larry Kings "How to Talk to Anyone, Anywhere... " He was able to confide and tell me about his most awful experience.
Haruna Speaks :
I am a computer science graduate and to survive I run a cyber cafe in my town, with the little money I earned I was able to cater for my essential needs.
Soon I found Love with a young Malian girl (girl from Mali). She was really beautiful and dainty, but what attracted me to her was her character ; she talked, walked with courtesy. Funny and gregarious, she added spice and variety to my life. Aisha was always optimistic about Life and though she was really younger, I took every counsel she gave. Allah had bestowed her with wisdom.
6 Months later
It was a rainy evening, I had just returned home from work, eager to meet my wife. As usual she bounced to the sitting room as I walked in and announced that she was pregnant. Too soon for me to believe because after her last miscarriage(it was an ectopic pregnancy though), the doctor had said that she had less chance of being pregnant and if she did, she may not survive it).
Well, I was so happy to hear that but that meant regular visits to the doctor in case of any complications .
I loved Aisha so much and I wanted her only to carry my baby, I wanted to be a father to her baby, my baby. I was ready to go through it with her, all the way.
Our love grew stronger that a few times leaving for work or a trip meant Aisha shedding a few tears. Life went on, good enough, her pregnancy developed fine and there wasn't any complications, so we got ready for our baby's arrival bit by bit.
9 Months later
The weather was cold, I had returned home late from work too and after sipping a cup of hot tea with Aisha, I got in bed really tired from the day's work. Aisha later tidied the house and joined me in bed.
At exactly 9:16pm, Aisha woke me up. She said she thought her water just broke and she was beginning to feel pains too. I was really feeling sleepy and fatigued so I told her to time her contractions (at least that was what the doctor told us; "time the contractions before running off to the hospital, in that case you can tell of its getting closer" ).
She just got out of bed and I dozed off;
If someone had told me that this was the last night I was going to spend with my darling, I would have fought with that person, but with each passing hour, her departure from this life, from my life was getting closer. I wished I could do things a lot more different. I wished Life had being fair enough to Us. My baby, Aisha and me.
[ Haruna paused, his eyes were turning blood red, he gulped down the wine in his glass and looked out of the round window]
Aisha's screaming jolted me back to reality. And I flew out of bed; I later found her in the bathroom. I guess she was taking her "last" bath before being a mom but she got a contraction there as she was about to step out of the bath tub. I washed my face and legs quickly and then helped her put on a comfortable gown, she asked for her pearl earrings and her lip gloss "what!? I thought we're heading for the hospital?" I asked a bit surprised . She managed to smile " I want to feel beautiful today my baby's born ". Well it was weird but I let her put them on anyway . The hospital bag was ready so I just grabbed it and off we went , on our way to the hospital.
By the time we got there, it was 10:23pm. Aisha had a hard time being calm. I had to hold her up all the time she felt like collapsing to the floor in pains.
Unfortunately, the nurses told us that they had no room available for her yet. The labour room was in use already. It was saddening, Knowing fully well about Aisha's condition, I knew it was a risk to do otherwise like take her home and call and elderly lady to take her birth or something .
There was a private hospital not too far from this one but I had the fear if Aisha could manage being transferred again and worse still, it was raining.
Anyways, I called a cab and managed to get her in, she looked pitiable by now. She just groaned in pains and breathed heavily like she wanted to die. I was extremely sorry for her.
We got there and quickly the nurses wheeled her in, asked a few questions and told us to wait briefly for the doctor to come.
"wait!? " I yelled.
"yes, we follow protocols here ". One short black nurse answered
"damn protocols, she's dying in pains can't you hear her? " I yelled still and they didn't answer me.
I went into the room where they kept her; No one had checked her or something, they just left her to die slowly [he bit his lips]. I held her hands and they felt frail, she was obviously getting tired but each time she moved or groaned, I felt her pains.
"my legs, the baby" she managed to say. It took only a few seconds for me to understand her, I ran out in fury
"Nurse! Nurse! She needs help." I was shouting... Just then a Middle aged man came in
"Are you the doctor, please hurry, my wife is dying " I pleaded.
He quickly dropped his brief case and put on a lab coat and gloves, then he followed me promptly, ordering the nurses around as usual.
I could tell Aisha was too tired already, she had no strength to even push out my baby.
So they quickly set up an IVF drip for her.
Aisha was gasping and groaning, I could feel her pains. The Doctor opted for a Cesarean Section to be done but I had no money enough to even deposit the half sum of 80,000. So they battled on until they brought out the baby, she was dead already but the nurses didn't let me know. They just made me believe that they need to take our baby to a nearby baby center for intensive care.
I refused to leave Aisha's side all the while,
soon they brought an oxygen tank and fixed it for her while trying to control the bleeding, she was bleeding endlessly for over two hours and she was still visibly in pains. This was already the evening of the second day since we left home. I was exhausted. [He paused to dry his tears.]
Did Aisha Survive it?
(I asked after a few minutes of sympathising with him )
On Friday, with the call to Muslims for Prayers at 4:00pm Aisha died but she was already dead before then.
How do you mean?
The doctor later came to check on her, only to discover she was brain dead, he told me to sign , so he could remove the oxygen mask from her face but I refused, I wanted to give Aisha a chance to survive, a chance to live even when I knew her chances were none.
Well finally she chose not to fight anymore, she chose to let go of me, she went where the pain can't reach her.
Post mortem said she died of a ruptured womb. I was devastated
Haruna talks about Life after:
Life is totally unfair, I was poor that's why I got treated like that. I had no one to turn to...
I had my baby and wife buried in same cemetery and on the same day.
Going back home was awful, but the nurses insisted that I can't sleep in the hospital , I finally got home and when I walked in , Her clothes, Her foot wares, her body care kits, even her night gown reminded me so much of her, I broke down and wailed. Bad people get married and have kids, why does this have to happen to Aisha and me ?
My birthday was coming up in two weeks and there was no Aisha to make me feel special, I left her things as she had left them before we left.
When did this happen?
Six months ago, and I am still trying to recover. Doctors say that I am suffering from Post traumatic stress.
I wanted to sue the hospital for everything but... I didn't anymore... Suing them won't take away the grief or pain. It wouldn't help me heal.
They say Time heals almost everything but for me it's bringing up old memories. I just can't forget all the pains I saw her go through.
I just can't forget how incapable I was, I couldn't help her more.
So what do you do to relieve stress now?
Apart from the fact that I am on drugs, I visit her grave every Friday, I talk to her about how life after her departure has being [he sobs] but you know, Aisha doesn't answer me. Right now I'm travelling back home to see how I can start life afresh.
